Here's some correspondence between me and a college friend I thought I'd share:
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I've used a few mixes, but I haven't actually tried any from scratch pancake recipes, believe it or not. I'm putting it on my to-do list for when I get home (I'm traveling for work right now). I also tend to do a lot of wheat-free stuff, since I can't eat it and a lot of people with food allergies also can't, so a little bit of a selfish bias, there. :) However, you are in luck with your kiddo's allergies. There is a wealth of good vegan recipes online, and since you can still use wheat flour, they should come out tasting pretty close to the real thing. This is one of the first ones that turned up in my search, and it sounds pretty good.
http://www.thegrocerygame.com/
You can also replace the eggs with bananas, applesauce, or pumpkin (about 1/4 cup). I've done it with cake mix, too, and it worked really well. I also use ground flax seed as an egg replacer a lot, but I'm not sure I'd recommend it for cakes. It doesn't go well with fluffy. You can replace the milk with soy or almond milk. I've never had any trouble doing that in baked goods (or pretty much any recipe, for that matter.)
I have heard a lot of the Duncan Hines cake mixes are dairy free because they are kosher, although I have not checked that out myself. You can also get dairy free cake mixes on Amazon, if you have trouble finding a health food store in your area. Or use the substitutions I mentioned above in a regular cake recipe (although it might wind up a little heavier than usual). I've also made frosting using just powdered sugar, crisco, and flavoring, following this recipe
http://www.chow.com/recipes/
It was pretty good, the only drawback is it gets a little runny if it sits awhile. That just means you have to eat the cake right away. Not that much of a disadvantage if you ask me. :)
Can I share your question on my blog?
Best of luck!
Amy
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